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The Baloney, the Pickle, the Zombies, and Other Things I Hide From My Mother

by Bradley Walton

Trevor is in the basement experimenting. He wants to build an army of zombies... by bringing baloney to life. Will his plan work before the expiry date?

Average Producer Rating:

 About 30 minutes

Times given are approximate and do not include intermissions/scene changes/breaks


 8
1 W | 7 Any Gender, Doubling Possible


Simple Set


 34 pages

Reviews from Past Producers

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In addition to traditional live stage performance rights, The Baloney, the Pickle, the Zombies, and Other Things I Hide From My Mother can also be performed under the following scenarios.

Virtual Performance

A Virtual Performance is a performance on an online web conferencing platform such as Zoom, Microsoft Teams, Skype, or Google Meets where performers are geographically isolated from one another and not together on a stage.

No audience is physically present with the performers. The audience is logged in to the same web conferencing platform as the performers.

Each time the play is performed for a virtual audience of any size (whether or not admission is charged) constitutes one performance.

Livestream Performance

Productions of The Baloney, the Pickle, the Zombies, and Other Things I Hide From My Mother may be Livestreamed.

All Livestream Performances must be conducted through our Authorized Streaming Partner, BookTix. Please contact BookTix at info@booktix.com for more information about Livestreaming.

A Livestream Performance is a traditional performance that is livestreamed to the Internet as the actors are performing. Instead of watching the show live in the theatre, the audience watches virtually from their home or other location.

All Livestream Performances must be conducted through our Authorized Streaming Partner, BookTix. Please contact BookTix at info@booktix.com for more information about Livestreaming.

A Livestream Performance may be pre-recorded. Recordings for pre-recorded Livestreams may be made if the recording is destroyed at the conclusion of the production. Should the producing organization want to retain the recording for archival purposes, they must purchase a separate Videorecording License from Theatrefolk.

Theatrefolk charges no additional fees for permission to Livestream. However, BookTix will charge nominal fees to the producing organization. Theatrefolk does not have any financial interest in BookTix and does not receive any commission or fees from BookTix.

Theatrefolk cannot be held responsible for any issues, technical, financial, legal, or otherwise, arising from the producing organization’s relationship with BookTix.

Each time the show is Livestreamed (whether performed live or pre-recorded) constitutes one performance.

One license, three ways to use it

Each royalty you purchase can be used as a Traditional Live Stage Performance, Virtual Performance, or Livestream Performance. How you choose to use your performance license is up to you! Performances need not all be of the same type so long as the total number of performances given does not exceed the total number of performances ordered.

How to Order

Click on the red "Add to Cart" button, then select "A Production"

“What are you doing with the baloney?” That’s the question Emma asks her big brother Trevor when she finds him in the kitchen at 2 A.M.

But Trevor is up to much more than a late night snack — he’s bringing food to life with experiments he hopes will lead to the creation of zombies he can sell as cheap laborers.

Together with his living baloney-minon, Meyer, Trevor is about to embark on a night in which he will face an angry neighbor, be questioned by police, bring a pickle to life, and discover that his food may actually be smarter than he is... all while trying to keep everything secret from his mother and little sister.


Characters

 8
1 Woman, 7 Any Gender, Doubling Possible

TREVOR/TRINA [A]
268 lines
A teenage genius who is conducting preliminary experiments on food products as a step towards creating zombies.
EMMA/EDDIE [A]
59 lines
Trevor’s little sister/brother, age 8.
MEYER [A]
205 lines
A piece of baloney Trevor has brought to life (can be a slice or a whole sausage).
POLICE OFFICER [A]
38 lines
Near retirement age.
MRS. WEAVING [W]
12 lines
The neighbor.
VLAD [A]
10 lines
A pickle Trevor brings to life.
CATHY/CHARLIE [A]
4 lines
Trevor’s mother/father.
VERONICA/VICTOR [A]
13 lines
A member of the opposite sex who Meyer met in a coffee shop.


Prop List

Pack of baloney, Cup or glass, Roll of paper towels, Droopy brown “pickle”, Hammer or mallet, Several containers of spice, including “nutmeg”, Wires, 3 Energy drinks, Bucket of “baking soda”, Keys, Pencil and paper


Production Photos


Related Titles

Purchase Orders accepted from US and Canadian Schools.
Info for your purchasing department.

All others must pay at the time of ordering.

Not sure what you need to order? Check out our pricing and ordering guide.

Royalty fees apply to all performances whether or not admission is charged. Any performance in front of an audience (e.g. an invited dress rehearsal) is considered a performance for royalty purposes.

Exemption details for scenes and monologues for competition.

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 About 30 minutes

Times given are approximate and do not include intermissions/scene changes/breaks


 8
1 W | 7 Any Gender, Doubling Possible


Simple Set


 34 pages

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